Circus comes to town
Just weeks after the Berlin Circus came to town, I can reveal that this week sees the arrival of the Holyrood In-a-state Circus for a suitably patronising tour of the islands.
Ringmaster - owner, manager, Press Officer, selector of the acts, organiser, publicity officer and unquestioned head honco - Alex "Gourmand" Salmond will host, present, introduce and generally take all credit or the For One Night Only show.
He will introduce "Honest" John Swinney on the financial high wire, balancing no money and expensive promises.
Full supporting cast of dumb animals, who can perform tricks - opening this, getting photographed at that - with only the gentlest prod from Mr Salmond.
The clowns - MacNeil and Allan - will entertain the massed crowds of SNP supporters instructed to turn up for the day with vacuous statements, a blizzard of empty press releases and the ability to say nothing for sixty seconds on tv and radio. These two are guaranteed to produce laughs as MacNeil attempts to smooth talk any/all young women in the audience and Allan stands around using his Blackberry in the hope of finding a friend.
The mess left behind by the circus will be tidied up by the local tax payer.
Ringmaster - owner, manager, Press Officer, selector of the acts, organiser, publicity officer and unquestioned head honco - Alex "Gourmand" Salmond will host, present, introduce and generally take all credit or the For One Night Only show.
He will introduce "Honest" John Swinney on the financial high wire, balancing no money and expensive promises.
Full supporting cast of dumb animals, who can perform tricks - opening this, getting photographed at that - with only the gentlest prod from Mr Salmond.
The clowns - MacNeil and Allan - will entertain the massed crowds of SNP supporters instructed to turn up for the day with vacuous statements, a blizzard of empty press releases and the ability to say nothing for sixty seconds on tv and radio. These two are guaranteed to produce laughs as MacNeil attempts to smooth talk any/all young women in the audience and Allan stands around using his Blackberry in the hope of finding a friend.
The mess left behind by the circus will be tidied up by the local tax payer.
13 comments:
Can we get tickets?
Word has it that the College have put new toilet pans in for the visit. Can anyone confirm this, and was it the tax payer who is picking up the tab.
I Think the lazy chick could do with one of these pans to hold the Sh one t that it spouts
I am not surprised they need new toilet pans for Salmonds visit. With his expenses of £400 a month for food from the Westminster Parliament alone his arse must be about to explode.
new toliet pans for the amount of venemous sh##e that comes out of Calum Iain's mouth perhaps??
Be interesting to see who is lobbying for what this time. Now the ferries have fallen and windpower is sliping off the agenda, what will the main topic be?
Community buyouts, Health Board, HIE, schools, fuel prices, our dissapointment at Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dee and their antics since election?
I expect nothing will be said of any significance, after all these guys are technically on holiday. Just lots of political twaddle and platitudes.
Is that you, a Dhomhnuill Iain? A Chalum Iain?
Am I right in assuming that Salmond and his circus are about to carry out a PR Stunt in the Western Isles at tax payers expense to push forward his looney idea of breaking up the UK ??
9:46, I get the feeling that if 'Salmond and his circus', as you so generously term them, didn't come to the Hebrides, you would be one of the first to bitch about decisions being made in the Central belt, without consultation.
And as for 'taxpayers expense'...um, just update us on how much has been spent on the futile wars in Iraq and Afghanistan? The increasingly common sight of coffins being unloaded from planes on the news also shows it's not just money the New Labour government is wasting, but lives.
These vitriolic comments are just typical of the Labour mentality, which is not capable of accepting the fact that they no longer able to contribute anything constructive and can only resort to the type of vile poison that has no place in civilised society.
He's announced an extra £800k for Gaelic education, told us that the ferries are busy since RET (nothing was mentioned about the Barra Buoy trying to turn a lot of them back because they drive campervans) and is busying up his campaign for Independence which will make us broker than we already are.
I think that is a fabulous use of tax payers money, think of how many of us on the dole will benefit.
Does anyone really think that bringing a road show to Stornoway will have any influence on anything at all? This would apply to any government, Hollyrood, Westminster, Labour, SNP, Tory. Is it not woefully apparent that democracy is on the wane in the UK. Like everyone else, the SNP told a whole load of fat porkies to get elected, now do exactly as they want but are cunning enough to swan around making the little people feel important.
Usual negativity from LazyChicken, echoed by usual few embittered readers. Yawn.
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